Back-to-School Blues and "Courage"

Hello friends!

Believe it or not, today is Friday August 17, 2007 and I have been back in school teaching for two and half weeks already! Luckily, thanks to Hawaii Statehood Day, I have a well-needed three-day weekend. Actually, as I will spend one full day of the weekend doing work for my classes, I should say it is my first two-day weekend of the year. It has not been an easy start, but I'd like to think I'm getting into a routine that will be manageable.


Anyway, the beginning of the school year was tough. In retrospect, the number of things that didn't go right were almost comical. At the time, however, they resulted in a few gray hairs and even a few tears. If anyone has a doubt that public schools are desperately short on funds, let Kahuku High and Intermediate School clear your doubts. If I were to compare the operations of my school with my old DC law firm, it would be instantly obvious how much an extra million or two could improve the operations and overall quality of our school. That said, most of the teachers and administrators dutifully undertake their labors-of-love while simultaneously trying to respect their personal time, not allowing themselves to become work-for-free slaves of Hawaii. That in itself is a tough balancing act, never mind the thousand or so and ever-increasing expectations placed on teachers.

So, let me start from the beginning. Because Hawaii's schools start so early, I actually was two days late returning to work for the new year. Luckily, my principal gave me permission to miss those two days as I was completing my M.Ed. back on the mainland. Still, missing two teacher work days was a lot, especially when your classroom had become the storage space for several other teachers who left the school in the spring. That was strike one. When I did arrive on campus on Monday July 29th, however, could I begin sorting through the chaos that my classroom had become? Nope. I had to attend an all-day training session for the new reading program I would be teaching. The training was helpful, but it included a lot more of a sales-pitch than I thought was necessary. Sigh...

Finally, I got one full day in my classroom to set up for the students' return. Unfortunately, I spent most of that day dealing with a crashed computer, looking for a functioning photocopier, trying to track down a TV and DVD-player that I would need to teach the new reading curriculum, and searching in vain for my students' textbooks. In the midst of it all, a handful of new 7th-graders and their parrents appeared in my classroom as part of their orientation. Could someone have sent me an email, memo, or anything to let me know that they would be coming?!?? Apparently, only core course teachers were privy to this orientation. Many of us "fringe" teachers had a similar experience of shock when these students and some parents arrived in our rooms unannounced. I felt completely deprived of that oh-so-critical opportunity to make any sort of first impression. I winged-it the best I could, but I had no handouts, no nothing. In fact, my classroom was still a mess from its role as a summer storage center. I'm not saying that I could have cleaned up everything, but I could have pulled something together that would give an impression that a) I am an organized teacher and b) students might enjoy the class. Again, sigh...

Now, about those textbooks: When I was a student back at Ladue Horton Watkins High School in St.Louis, Missouri (which I am learning in retrospect why it was such a good school) it was part of the first-day ritual to collect all your textbooks from your teachers. No time to waste, you pretty much jump right in to learning. In Hawaii this is not an expectation. I was appalled to learn that teachers cannot necessarily expect to have their new books on day 1. I would have had a clash with our school librarian over this, except I realized that she was working as hard as she could to get them in our hands and complete her inventory of the new books. This was another instance of culture shock. Apparently, the state doesn't have much concern over the fact that librarians need more time to complete this task. Rather, many teachers just start the year without books. While teaching without books doesn't necessarily amount to lost instructional time, it definitely interrupts it. Furthermore, it leaves students the impression that it is acceptable to be unprepared. How can we expect students to be prepared for school when the school itself isn't prepared for school?

While I was frustrated by delay on the books, it was when they finally arrived that I just about lost it. Two days into the new year, I received an email from the school librarian informing me that I could come over and pick up my new books. Our campus is huge and roads/sidewalks are crumbling all over the place. (At least I had secured a functioning computer on which to receive said email. Ha!) Anyway, the thought of carrying the books from the library was ridiculous. I had three 30-lb boxes waiting for me. I had no cart and certainly no one to deliver the books, so I drove my car to the library intent on loading up my trunk. There was no place to park at the library and there is no loading zone, so I pulled my little car onto a little corner of entrance ramp and put on my flashers. When I came out about ten minutes later, I found a parking ticket on my windshield!! Are you kidding me?!?? How on earth am I supposed to do my job here? In my best attempt to remain calm, I had (kind-ish) words with the library security guard and managed to convince her to rip up the ticket. Still...is all this supposed to support teachers? Its supposed to make us want to come to school and work every day? Chasing around books, broken computers, and broken photocopiers?


So, those are a few of the things that marked the beginning of the new school year. There were a couple of positive things. After working at the school since February, I finally got a key to a faculty bathroom, I learned that there are two other photocopiers in the school besides the main office copier (not that they always work), I met a slew of very kind teachers and administrators, and I've made some headway - albeit slow - in classroom discipline. I learned that I can borrow books from the English Department book room. I also learned the location of said mystery book room. I have already obtained a couple dozen books from said mystery book room that will benefit my beloved ELL students. I *finally* managed to get a working TV and DVD player, although after searching in vain for the cord to connect the components, I had to break down and buy one at WalMart with my own money (along with another $50-worth of other needs I couldn't wait for a purchase order to fill).

As an ELL-certified teacher (not reading certified), I'm on a steep learning curve with respect to my reading classes. I have a class made up of six 7th grade boys who manage to make me crazy nearly every day. By sixth period when they arrive, the classroom is at least 80-degrees and dusty. The tradewinds, while giving some relief, blow the dust from the adjacent football field directly into my classroom. Still, I'm breathing and day by day things are getting better. My grade-level vice-principal and some other teachers have given me some helpful tips for dealing with my tough 6th period crowd. They at least appreciate my determination to improve the class. I've also managed to persuade a few of these boys to help the class stay a bit more focused. Deep down I know that these boys are good human beings who are merely trying to fit in, find their way, and are extremely insecure about their reading abilities. Any insults they hurl at me (or each other for that matter) are simply not personal.

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So, after all of this, you may wonder why on earth I am still in this job when I indeed have a law degree and could probably increase my salary by at least 50% and be back in an air-conditioned office with a state-of-the-art computer? Here's a short-yet-true story from the first days of school that will explain it all:

Courage - by Lisa Rodvien

Last spring, I had students in my 7th-8th grade ELL class write about the four events that impacted their lives the most. The things that students had experienced floored me. One particular student wrote about his move from a small South Pacific nation to California, how his mother had died in childbirth, how he himself had to have open-heart surgery, and how his family left their somewhat violent neighborhood in Southern California to live in Hawaii with relatives. When we were coming up with a title for his piece, I suggested "Courage" because I was amazed at how much courage he had to get through all those tough circumstances. He liked the title and used it.

This year, I have the same student back as a 9th grader. On an information sheet that I have the students fill out to give me contact information, their class schedules, etc., I also ask them to write five words that describe themselves. The student's first word was "Courage."

Now you know why I keep coming back.